Chaddi Pehen Ke Fool Khada Hai

Come one, come all! Participate in the "Pink Chaddi" campaign this Valentine's Day to assert your being and raise your voice against the violators of our Constitution.

Women (and men, too!) all over the country are collecting pink chaddis and sending them to Shri Shri Pramod Muthalik as a Valentine’s Day gift. Surprised? Don't be! The idea is to arouse disgust and shame and other 'moral' feelings in the heart (?) of our beloved CEO of Morality, Inc. Yes, you heard me right - heart! He doesn't have a brain, now, does he? But he has a heart that's so filled up to the brim with filth, and beats so for a culture which according to him exists and we all agree to.

The aim of the campaign is to scream from rooftops the infalliable fact that this monster (no, no, that's not a typo on 'mobster') has been busy piling up his bigoted views on 'culture' and 'dignity' and 'chastity' and what not in filthy heaps all over the nation. We just cannot let HIM, of all people, take our freedom away.

Gifting panties may seem like a soft, even mushy, way to protest. Yeah, I know. But trust me, I seriously did consider options like face-blackening or dung-splattering these morons. On second thoughts, however, it gives much more credence to our collective lack of 'morals' and 'shame' and 'virtue', those extremely desirable qualities the revered Morality, Inc. is so very desperate to see in us women.

What's more, the campaign planners will hold a press meet to announce their collection of pink chaddis. The campaign is all about letting people know what we think of Muthalik and his goons, these blots on our society. Shri Shri Muthalik used the media in a clever and planned manner to cover the Mangalore assault, thereby getting their propaganda known far and wide. So why not give them a taste of their own medicine?

Girls, contribute chaddis in all shades - baby pink, bubblegum pink, rose pink, candy pink, candyfloss pink, hot pink, fuschia, magenta, whatever! They can be lacy, frilly, high-cut, thong-like, cotton, silk, spandex, whatever! Don't have a pink chaddi, you say? Well, go and buy them, then! Buy the cheap ones, though; it is recession-time, after all, and seriously, Victoria's never intended to let out her Secret, if you get what I mean!

Boys, if you don't wear (or at least don't own) the pink 'uns, buy a pair or two and contribute to this 'moral' cause. Heck, borrow from your girl! Better still, boys, you can also send in a pink 'dhoti' or 'lungi' or 'langot' or even one with a pink 'naada', for this is all about preserving Indian culture! Just-for-men hint: polka dots make it even better. You can also pepper your contributions with one-liners such as "Real Men", "Macho Me", "I Love Pink and Respect Women", and so on. Just a thought!

If you're not already doing it, or have done it, please film yourself or others doing it, with reactions and views of the contributors, and put it all up on Youtube. Its all about publicity. A real kick in the you-know-where to Shri Shri Muthalik.

However, a teeny-weeny part of my mind cautions me: Will he even get what this is all about? Is he capable of understanding, the moron?